Roll Out the Red Carpet He's Home

by Susan
(Upland )

you have all the responsibility. After 21 yrs of marriage I discovered what his life on the road was all about.

Actually he was a Greyhound bus driver. He was only home 2 days a wk. It was hard for our son. He wasn't a father but his son's friend. That's not what a boy really needs from his dad.

His dad because of his guilt, didn't give our son the guidance or discipline he needed. So our son didn't have the consistency he needed. I was the heavy. His dad was rarely home for more than 24 hrs. That time was spent playing video games and basketball with our son.

I late discovered he had a double life. He became deeply in debt due to his compulsive gambling. He always took runs to Vegas, Laughlin, or one of the tracks.

He was away from home one time up to 4 mos. Lived with a fellow that was an alcoholic and had an open relationship. The two spent their off days on the nude beaches.

As a Christian it was hard to handle. What does he not tell me. Years later I would find out. Most of our equity went to pay his gambling debts.

He blamed the woman he had had an affair with.

The first red flag, he told me I was lucky all the other drivers had affairs and gambled half their pay cheeks away. He could no longer not follow his peers. He chose to follow the crowd.

He always told me what I wanted to hear, that just another year then he would take a regular run ( a 9 to 5 ) home nights. But after 20 yrs of marriage he admitted that he could never have such a boring job as the 9 to 5.

Wish I had known the truth my life wouldn't have been waiting for the 9 to 5 job he always promised. Soon I became board rolling out the red carpet for when he would come home whenever that might be.

We are now divorced and I am happily remarried. He has been in love with a married woman who has an open marriage. He has what I would call an extended family.

My son says it's strange he has dinner with her and her husband and his dad. My son is good friends with her son. Life is strange. This so makes me appreciate my present husband. He deserves the red carpet treatment for sure.

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Jun 25, 2012
Dear Roll Out NEW
by: Helonwheels

Honey, your husband was like this before ever meeting you. He was destined to have affairs and open relationships before he met you. He had these behaviors before he met you and believe it he had these behaviors before he ever became a driver, he more than likely took this job so that he could use it as a cover to commit these behaviors unbeknownst to you. The proof is in the pudding as he still lives this lifestyle today, only professional help will ever mend his ways.

I just want to put it out there so you and others know that just because a truck driver is away from home doesn't automatically make him/her a no good woman chaser and gambler. These types of behaviors are from addictive personality disorders and it is there long before they became drivers. And also these behaviors are in all walks of life including:

Teachers, Lawyers, Doctors, Nurses, Judges, Priests, Clergymen, Traveling Salespersons, Postal workers, Waitress's, Wall Street Stock Brokers, Financial Advisers, I think you get the picture?

I am so happy you were able to lift yourself up and out of a situation that was going nowhere fast, I am sorry it took you so long to figure it out, but on a positive note you had to live through it to understand it and now you wont be so quite naive. You have a forgiving heart and now you still have the ability to give your new husband and yourself the respect you both so deserve! :)

God Bless!
Helonwheels :)

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