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New at all this over the road stuff

by Courtney
(Chckamauga,GA)

With the economy the way it is my husband had no choice but to get his CDLs because that's the only job out there but what we didn't know at the time was that he was going to have to drive over the road for at least 6 months before he could get a job close to home.

So i put on my girl pants and said good-bye to him. He has been gone for almost a month and its very very hard because we have a 3 month old baby at home. My family and friends told me when he left that she wouldn't know here daddy isn't here because she is so young but she knows he isn't here.

She will just cry her little eyes out some days for no reason at all and there isn't anything you can do for her and I know that's her way of telling me she is missing her daddy.

With him being gone all the time its just like being a single parent. Its not easy by no means but I just do what I have to do for my little girl. There are some days where I just don't feel like getting out of the bed but I do because I know that little girl needs me.

People say they know what I'm going through and it will get easier but they don't know how it feels to see your best friend get on that greyhound with your heart in his hands and drive off. As far as it gettin easier, I hope it will but I doubt it.

Me and my husband have never been away from each other they whole time we have been together so this has been a real challenge for us but they sayin distance makes the heart grow fonder is so true because I have no doubt that I love my husband. This has actually brought us closer.

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May 29, 2011
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I understand completely how you feel
by: Melissa

I know how you feel. My husband did the same thing with the same goal to find a local cdl driving job. We have a 3 yr old son who misses his daddy very much. He talks to him on the phone every day, but it is getting old because my husband left for training on March 17th 2011 and has not been able to come home yet! They are screwing him around on the time he is in training. They are telling him that he should get tested this coming week, but this has been what they have said for 2 weeks now. We just have to hold on till he can get through the next 6 months till he can find something local. On top of him leaving my mother died the week before he left and my grandpa the month before that. So I absolutely understand about not being able to get out of bed some days. The first couple of weeks were the worst. My son spent a lot of time sitting on my bed playing with his cars. I have decided to finish some projects that we had either started long ago or things in the yard that we have talked about doing for a long time. It helps because it keeps you busy and you don't have time to think about it. I just want to get our home cleaned up and looking nice for the day when he finally does get to come home.

May 26, 2011
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helping your little one.
by: Anonymous

Ok, this worked for my now 2yr old when daddy was gone. 1. keep something of his out of the wash. tshirt pillow case, whatever. Keep this near her, car seat bouncy seat ect (as long as its not a hazard.) 2. Make videos. She will not realize that daddy is not there if she can hear and see him on a daily basis. If she can hear his voice she will know it and everything will be so much easier. Use speaker phone on your cell as much as possible when your on the phone with him or atleast to where she can hear it.

Try these for a couple of days and see how this goes.

May 26, 2011
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Join our Group
by: Kathy S

truckerswife4life@groups.facebook.com

ask to join this group, we are a FINE, FUN, LOVING, SUPPORTIVE, CREATIVE and GREAT SHOULDERS TO LEAN AND CRY ON. I found this group and it has been a LIFE saver to me. My Hubby just started driving over the road on March 8 and it has been HARD but with the Help and Advice I get from these ladies it does help and they do listen.
Just ask to Join, it is a CLOSED group so anything you post noone can read only the group members. So it is VERY nice. Hope to see you on there soon. There are also alot of Moms with littles ones and expecting ones on there too.
God Bless
Kathy

May 26, 2011
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I understand
by: Rabbit_B

There should be a disclaimer statement that everyone should sign when they become a trucker...something about knowing that this is not going to be easy, and that if I am a newlywed or have young children it might be even harder than I realize....

If it helps any, think of those that have SO's in Iraq or Afghanistan. They are gone for much longer than 6 months, they don't get to occasionally come home, and they are in harm's way 100% of the time. Your SO is much safer, closer, and you DO get to see him occasionally. I have always found that if I think how much worse things could be, then my troubles don't seem quite as bad.

AS for you little one missing Daddy...it will get better. Quite often the little ones pick up on the anxiety that we are having as adults and they don't have the coping skills to deal with it that we have developed over the years. That doesn't make it any easier for you...just tougher. But know that thousands have experienced this before you and survived...you will too. Humans are tough and pretty resilient. "What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger."

Now, just think of the things you CAN do while he's gone. Document little things in the baby's life on film, and find some positive aspects to dwell on when it gets particularly rough. And know that 6 months will FLY by. Remember how long the school year was in Kindergarten compared to how short it was when you were in high school? That's even longer than 6 months. It's shorter than a pregnancy, too!

Good luck!

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