My Trucker Husband's double Life

I have been married to my husband for over 5 years all of which he has been driving regional and 3 yrs. OTR. It has been hell.

He has had two affairs that I know about and multiple other "incidents" Calls, Texts,so called friend, all over the US, strip clubs and God only knows what else.

He says all he's doing is working, nothing I wouldn't approve of. But I am constantly catching him in lies. He will lie untill he cant lie no more. He got some little fat ugly 18 yr old truck stop waitress pregnant ,while I was pregnant, and wouldn't fess up to it til I got got the CC bill for the abortion.

He swore on our children's lives that he never slept with her. He is a disgusting piece of crap who doesn't deserve me or his kids. He says he loves us more than anything in the world, we complete him, everything he does is for us blah blha blha... But he gets in that truck and forgets all about us.

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Aug 07, 2010
My heart goes out to you
by: Anonymous

I am so sorry to hear about your how this has affected your life. To be honest I think all of us trucker wives are scared of this same thing. I pray you have the strength to figure out your next move of what you should do. My husband is a trucker too, so my heart just goes out to you. To try to put myself in your shoes mentally , it is overwhelming. The trust that you gave him to go out and do this job, and acted like that was nothing to him. I hope and pray you and your children will be ok and maybe someday be able to forgive just for yourself.

Jul 04, 2010
Its Time To Discover You!!
by: Anonymous

It’s time to discover you.. Put him and all his lies on the back burner and find you. That way if you decide that this marriage is not for you then you and you children will have something to fall back on.. Go back to school and create the life that you deserve.. Life is too short and stops wasting your youth trying to fix something that is not fixable.. Fix you first and find some joy your life.. Always put God first and he will fix it for you...

May 04, 2010
Truckers and their double lives
by: Hervy

Sorry you are going through this ridiculous treatment. Be sure to surround yourself with positive people and seek counseling from someone who loves people more than money and God more than people. Your faith is the only rock solid enough assist you with such a serious situation the best way for you and your family.

There is no magic or therapeutic words to decrease the pain that you must feel, but I want you to know that as long as you are who you should be you will be the one better off when it's all said and done.

I don't know specifics or details and no one on the outside does but you do. You'll have to ask for guidance on the best course of action you need to take.

Keep in mind that what feels good today, may not be the right thing for you. Don't let your emotions cause you to be irrational. Outside counsel should help provide insight.

I hope that guys that do this will one day realize the pain they cause before they do these things.

In this case the pain will be realized as life goes on, when guilt eats away at the soul or resentment eats away at the relationship he will have (won't have) with his children.

Realize that this should not be something you let get you depressed (I know easier for me to say than for you to do) because it is you dealing with a problem inflicted upon you which means you have choices of how you deal with it and eventually you might have to deal with the consequences but not the problem.

He on the other hand has to deal with the problem internally and live with it the ongoing consequences directly and indirectly today and tomorrow until he decides to change and after.

The longer he travels the path he is traveling the more pain he will suffer from his actions. You can start healing internally now by not taking his actions personally and focusing your children and your health. (School, training, excercise anything else that is empowering and beneficial to your well being physical, financial, mental)

Apr 29, 2010
Double Life?
by: Dale

I am sorry that you are having to deal with this and raise children also.
the site below contains some very good advice

A marriage is built on faith, trust, honesty, with each other. A promise to commit ourselves to each other and no one else.
When these promises are broken, it leaves us wondering ,"What can I do", "What happened". "Maybe if I"; but all these thoughts are because we have been hurt and let down in our expectations of someone else.
I have been through the cheating and though I stayed, for a while longer. The trust was not there and for ME, I should have left when it fist happened, but I do know couples who have been able to work through infidelity and been very happy.

We cannot change anyone else.

I hope the site I posted here will help, but I do know something that will help, Prayer.
I pray that God guide and direct you along this journey.

Mar 21, 2010
The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly
by: Jennifer S

Unfortunately in this industry the divorce rate is extremely high!

As with any industry, there are the hazards.

I am very sorry you have experienced this, but it was not because he was a "Driver". Mainly because he was never committed to the relationship to begin with.

Affairs happen every day, and not just among truck drivers. Lawyers, Actors, Doctors, blue collard workers, steel workers, carpenters...on and on.

It is the man himself that creates this hell for his significant other- His career does not seem to matter. If he has a roaming eye, heart, and brain. There is no chance for the woman who loves him, and wants to stay faithful.

I do pray that all works out for YOU. This is a heartbreaking situation!

Jennifer S

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