It does get BETTER -- You can do it!

by Ariel
(Idaho, USA)

The first 9 months were so god-awful. He left for training (at a major SLC company) at the end of February and got officially hired on March 9th, 2016.
Our son was 7 months old.

From then until December 9th, he only came home 4 times (including a long moving trip from New Mexico to Idaho). It was so terrible, we talked about him quitting so many times.

Fortunately, we stuck it out and now it is much better. He was exhausted and run ragged and paid shit, and I was terrified of being alone with our infant; I didn't want to screw up.

As soon as that Training/Driving contract was fulfilled, he was out of there. He could find a better company, and I was kid-raising pro now.

But, we spent nearly three weeks looking for another job for him -- Christmas came and went. We were totally, completely, and utterly broke.

Finally, on January 2nd, 2017, a local Idaho family-owned company wanted to hire him and pay him well!

He could come home for 2-3 days every two weeks! WOO-HOO! Things were looking up! He could be less stressed now, and I could continue being a mom and holding down the fort.

An important thing we have learned (of many) was that we had to continue communicating. We had to keep reinvesting in our marriage and our family by calling each other every day, multiple times a day.

We didn't (and still don't) have extended family and friends to lean on; we just had each other. We talk about EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING. Guys, don't bottle anything up, don't hold anything in. If you do, you will be divorced post haste.

OTR Trucking relationships don't just exist when he comes home for 2-3 days a fortnight. Cherish the time you have together, even if it just a phone call or a text.

On January 3rd, 2018, we celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary, and March 9th will be 2 years in truck driving, and July 14th our son will be 3. We don't plan on having more children, so everything (husband working, me working, son going to school, $$$) should only get easier and more fun.

I love my husband and our son so much. It is a lot easier now to keep the family relationship alive. There are many more options now. When he comes home, we plan little staycations for the three of us, and our son loves all the daddy time he can get.

Before truck driving, and a child, we had the kind of relationship where we could do everything together. Literally, anything, for any length of time. We could be together all the time, 24/7, and not get irritated with each other.

It is an amazing thing, I love that about us. We had never even considered doing truck driving together before we got pregnant *d'oh!*, but it would have been a really nice arrangement (looking back on it now).

When our son gets older, maybe I'll join him on the road, but who knows what our life will be like by then. I just know I miss him when he's gone, and I am so happy when he's home, and I get to see him. (And the pay checks are nice too! haha)

If you are just starting out as a trucker's wife, you need to know that it will get better. You CAN do it, and you CAN be happy if you and your husband work on it together. The first two years will fly by, and he'll find better opportunities, and IT WILL BE OKAY.

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Apr 12, 2018
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No problem
by: Hervy

You're welcome!

Feb 05, 2018
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Thx
by: Anonymous

Very Positive and useful information. Due to my husbands job I had to reduce my 3 night 12 hour shifts to just 1 shift a week and remain home.
Really tough adjustment for me having to do everything by myself.

My husband helped with everything but then he was out of training after 2 months and now He is OTR every week..home only on weekends...I am grateful that we get to see him at least 2 days a week but..its still hard.

Our children are 9,5 ,2 and 6 months....so this advice hit home..thanks again

Jan 29, 2018
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Such a Delightful Story
by: Hervy

Thanks for sharing that Ariel. Im sure it will help a lot of women push through.

Congrats to you and hubby making it work and getting over the hump.

Ladies I suggest you read her post several times. Lots of short, useful lines of advice and insight in there.

One I'd like to suggest in case u look over it.....get another job before leaving the one you're at unless you can go up to 3 months with no income!

If they didnt have a strong relationship just dealing with that stress alone could have ripped them apart!

And one more....communicate! Dont hold things in. Dont whine, complain, blame, yell, bark, put down..... TALK to each other.

In an understanding tone after listening to each other with eager ears.

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