I'm new to all this

by Erin
(Usa)

Why in the world is this literally the only chat support for us.

I am very new to this whole truck wife community. In fact I'm not married to him I'm engaged. We are going on year six of being together, 4 years of engagement. We have two beautiful boys.

I don not and have never thought he is not committed to this family, or is wanting to leave. He has just started at the trucking job back in September of 2018.

It was a rough start with him being gone the first month, I knew I would have to change my way of life for the sake of our family. On top of him being gone. otr. Is what he does.

I feel as if I'm a single mother who is alone and having to explain to my oldest (who is 4) , that his dad loves us and why he's not home, And to my youngest (who is 2), that not every man you see is your father.

I know this is the right thing to do for our family, it's only been almost 4 months and I'm already getting exhausted.

Learning that I have to be both. Mom and dad, both fun parent and mean parent. I think it confuses my kids that they won't know how to trust me or, be close to me due to confusion in there younger age.

I just want to speak to people who know what I'm going through. People say it's not like he's going away for good but, honestly when your in that moment, and you'll know the moment. When your waiting days, weeks for him to return it is like it's forever.

When no one around you knows what it's like for you. And for your family to go through such a huge change. It's hard.

We talk everyday on the phone yes it's something, but if you are a truckers wife then you know sometimes it's not enough.

I feel like without him here I have no support system, people to talk to. I feel alone in this cus let's face it family doesn't really understand, because they have never had to go through it themselves.

I'm here for advice, friends, connections.

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Jan 12, 2019
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FaceTime NEW
by: Anonymous

Being away for a year while deployed to japan in the marine corps I know a bit about being separated from your spouse. Now days with the internet it’s a bit better. After a year he can work to get a regional driving job which will get him home more often. If you have apple iPhones you can FaceTime. This is better than just phone calls.

It really comes down to family time versus driving time. My kids are 33, 29, and 28. I missed a lot of family time. I regret that now. Guys don’t see this until later. It sounds like you two have a lot to discuss face to face.

Good luck

Jan 11, 2019
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Sounds like have a great relationship
by: Hervy

It sounds like you two are close and get along well. Although I am surprised that you're not married yet after being together for that long.

I can imagine it being difficult to adjust to. Talking to someone in a similar situation will definitely be comforting.

Lots of ladies here going through it.

Depending on where you live, after he gets at least 6 months experience or as much as a year, he should be able to find something that gets him home at least every other weekend.

In some locations (near large cities) he can get a job that brings him home at least a day or two each week.

Also, I always tell couples to have a game plan. How long will he drive. Will he transition out of trucking? Will he become an owner operator? Will he start and grow a business on the side to replace the trucking career in 5 years?

If you work together on a budget and plan for the family including the income/work then it's something positive and reward to look forward to instead of a future of him being gone for weeks at a time.

Good luck and best wishes. If you have questions about the lifestyle feel free to ask.

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