What did I get myself into this time?

by Leah
(Mississippi)

Where to start...I have my Masters in Social Work. I met my boyfriend (ex boyfriend) 10 months ago. We spent literally hours on the phone everyday, I would cook meals for him to take on the road every week, and would meet him if he wasn't coming home to ensure he was getting food.


I did whatever to try and make his life as comfortable as I could. I got pregnant in December and it resulted in a miscarriage. Our biggest conflict in our relationship was his refusal to get off a dating site.

I will spare the details on why he refused but we all know his story remained innocent. He came home in April and lied about what he was about to do. I had a feeling and course I found that he had a woman at his house. This resulted in a huge fight and he insisted they were just friends.

This last week my friend found that he had changed his facebook status to in a relationshiip with another woman (not the one that was at his house.) All my friends thought he was trash from the beginning and they started playing investigators and that resulted in a lot of conflict.

When I went to look, I noticed he had blocked me on facebook. Of course my friend commented on his love triangle. His story.. someone was stalking him ion facebook and he put that he was in a relationship with "his friend" I told him I can't do this anymore.

Of course I have trust issues and all this is my fault. He reused to admit any wrong doing on his part. No problems are ever the result of his actions. It seems like every month some type of drama occurs.

This man was my best friend, my phone companion, my person that answered the whys in life, and my biggest motivator. He doesn't want me out of his life. He has come up with a load of crap about the fact that I'm educated and he has never felt like he was good enough for me.

He says he is not a good boyfriend and I deserve someone better; however, he wants to remain friends now that I can't do this anymore. I really have no idea why this has had such a huge impact on me.

I feel like my life has been turned upside down and I'm angry at myself for all the time and money I invested in this. I guess relationships like this are doomed to fail because of lack of trust.

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Jun 02, 2017
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by: Leah

We are talking about a 44 year old man that did all this. I was completely blind sided.

I assume at this age there is no growing up and his maturity level has already been reached.

Jun 02, 2017
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Glad you woke up
by: Hervy

Its like this Leah, I am a man who invested as much as u (as far as i can tell) to a woman who abused the situation as bad.

You dont dwell on it. You learn what you can and take with you for insight and guidance on how to screen better and make wiser decisions.

Hate you went through that but it could have been even worse. It could have lasted for years....and worse you could have children by him.

His not feeling good enough might have truth but it doesnt give him the right to lie and mislead. He could have had a conversation about that and feeling insecure.

Seems to be low quality to me or either just immature. So be thankful that you are out best friend or not.

He needs to grow prior to being in a relationship not at the expense of someone that loves him.

To keep messing with him is enabling him to stay the course. He needs to lear to change his behavior.

If you want to help him explain how he could look at the situation a differently and how to be considerate for the feelings of others. Otherwise he will never be good enough for not just u but any woman not for lack of a degree but for lack of how to treat people.

Meanwhile find something else constructive to do with your time. I started creating this website to invest my time and money in at that point.

Look what it lead too, me helping and being there for people who appreciate it! :-)

Best of luck

And dont be mad at yourself for that mistake however dont keep making them. Give that clown space. If he has matured and woke up and actually wants you, he will figure out how to prove it to you.

My 2 cents anyway

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