Confused - Is my trucking boyfriend cheating or frustrated?

by Chalis
(Tennessee)

My boyfriend and I have not been together long even though we moved in together not long into the relationship. He is a over the road driver and I am a stay at home mom.



Recently he had a heart attack and spent almost a week in the hospital. I stayed with him, except for the trips from hospital to hospital, the whole time. It put us back financially almost 2000 dollars.

So we have been having money problems, but we don't fight about it because that's not why im with him so it doesn't bother me.
However, because of it he recently had to turn in the truck that he had leased and go back to being a company driver.

Ever since he started driving company he has not wanted to talk as much as we used to and when we do has rather short tempered and in my opinion secretive.

For example, yesterday we talked for about half an hour in the morning and then he saied he would call me when he started driving last night. Around 830 i got a message saying that he was going to bed and that he had to start driving at 2am.

He had originally told me that he was driving at 11pm. He said he was alseep all day, even though he had slept all night the night before. Then tonight he said he had to drive around 1-2 am but when I asked if he would call me he said that it was to late to call. I told him that I didn't have to get up early so it was ok but then he said that he didn't even know if he would be driving.

Im worried that he is either frustrated and having second thoughts about us or he is cheating on me. Please help, my kids and I really love him.

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Aug 15, 2009
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Dont jump the gun just yet!
by: Jennifer S

Chalis

I realize your are confused, I would be as well.

First and Foremost I think that what needs pointed out is 3 things

1.) He just had a reality check with his health. He may be not talking, because he is working things out in his own mind. It would be my guess that yes, he is reconsidering things- but not nessesarily with you- But with his own life. Having such a health issue will give everyone some doubt, and give them reason to re-evaluate their own lives.

2.) Financial concerns are HUGE when it comes to men. That is how they define themselves.

Also, If he was working towards lease-to-own, and he lost that opportunity, he may be withdrawing to take time to think about where he is, and where he is going.

All I can tell you is this. Step back, but keep your hand out. Allow him this time to evaluate his own life. Be supportive, send him text messages, and emails letting him know that you are there for him when he is ready to talk.

DO NOT Push right now. I do not feel that would be advantageous to any of you.

Just be supportive in a non-evasive way.

Jen

Aug 15, 2009
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She's wondering.
by: Jimmy

Jen will weigh in on your question. Usually, a change in personality or habits means something, not necessarily that he's cheating. Having a heart attack and surviving it would certainly be a wake up call. Do not assume the worst just yet. Jimmy

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