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Impact on The Marriage

Ask questions about marriage and trucking from trucker's wives
Ask questions about marriage and trucker from A Trucker

The impact of trucking on the marriage will depend on several factors in a trucker's life. Hopefully you did well in choosing your spouse. This means you got married for reasons that matter in a relationship and not something stupid. There was a connection. You were on the same page. You both saw what you needed in a spouse.

If you got married for stupid qualities or reasons then the problems you will encounter in a long distance relationship with an incompatible spouse are too many to try and solve on a web page. (You need a good Christian counselor) For everyone else, there are several things to consider about trucking and marriage and happiness.

Personality

Your spouse should be the type of person who has independent qualities. Good self esteem. A strong will. A problem solver. Mature minded. Responsible. She should not be easily influenced by her friends, media, or family. She should be a person with ideas about the future and plans to get there! (lol with you in them, duh)But she also needs to be passionate, thoughtful, and caring so that you will feel appreciated when you return home. This is the kind of woman you want at home waiting on you. She adds quality to a trucker's life!

But what about you? You also need to . . .

Communication

To minimize the impact of trucking on the marriage both of you should be constantly trying to improve on your communication (unless you already got that). Don't place blame about misunderstandings, instead have a conversation about how to handle things when or if misunderstanding occurs. Do this, before they occur.

Your spouse should be able to reach you and talk to you about things that affect her during those days you are away from home . (If you care about your marriage) Put yourself in her shoes. By the same token, she should understand that you expect to be able to reach her reasonably. (That's where the thoughtfulness comes in). You need to keep each other in the loop of things in each others lives daily so that the physical distance apart doesn't tear you apart emotionally.

Handling The Money

Financial problems are the number one cause of divorce in the United States, what do you think will happen with the impact of trucking added to the marriage. You need to make sure you are handling what you should be handling at home. Trust me, make sure that your spouse is handling what is supposed to be handled at home also. (This is where the responsible and mature part comes in) Many truck drivers find out the money they were sending home wasn't going to the bills like it was supposed to.

By the same token, don't blow your check and leave your spouse to come up with the money for all the expenses at home while you goof off over the road. You'll be wondering why her attitude is changing.

You should sit down together and discuss your financial objectives. Know what is expected of each other. If either of you come up with a problem that keeps you from handling your end of the agreement at the time it is expected you should feel free to communicate with each other about it. You shouldn't hide or neglect it like some couples do.

Trust

Listen, if you know you've chosen the right woman and she has those qualities we mentioned earlier than stop worrying. There is nothing you can do from 2000 miles away. Without trust you don't have a marriage. Make sure your doing what you should be doing and it will help eliminate a lot of trust issues.

On the other hand, if there are other legitimate reasons that you have trust issues then you want to structure things so that you won't be taken advantage of.

(What that means will differ depending on individual circumstances.For instance, if she's out with her single friends every weekend and you can't reach her, I don't know if I would put all my money in joint accounts, or put the new car in her name or new house . . . you get my drift, don't be blind use your head)

Summary

If you and your spouses personalities compliment each other then you are ahead of many drivers on the road. If you and your spouse sincerely enjoy being around each other and look forward to seeing each other then you have the type of chemistry that withstands the challenges of a trucking family.

But take it even further. Be proactive in discussing other things that may come up before hand. Practice putting yourselves in each other's shoes when looking at issues, this will help both of you to make sure you are being fair at how you approach issues.

If you can, one of the best things you can do to reduce the impact of trucking on the marriage is take your spouse on the road with you for a few weeks. This is the best way for her to understand some of the situations you encounter. Why you can't always answer the phone, why sometimes you may sound like you have an attitude when you really don't (not with her anyway).

If you think about it. We encounter may situations on the road that can't be explained. If we try to explain it, it sounds unreal or even like an excuses. If you get your spouse out on the road with you see gets to see these things for herself.

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Impact on the Children
Disadvantages of Becoming A Truck Driver