vermont the trucker

by jennifer niska
(kelso wa.)

Well my husband is rarely home and we never can get along he says I don't love him because I don't show him.

How is one suppose to show him u love him if hes gone 90 percent of the year. I love him greatly. Also care about him. He never seems happy unless he is around.

Its very hard and I am willing to share my life with him forever. Its hard to share a life with someone u love when they accuse u of lying and everything else.

So being married to a trucker is very complicated unless u r driving on the road with him.

Love my trucker and always will.

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Oct 19, 2014
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get a life NEW
by: Anonymous

Maybe if you were not Methed out most of the time, lying to him and steeling his money he would want to be around you more.

May 31, 2014
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It's Not You, It's Him NEW
by: Anonymous

Do yourself a favor & my advice to you is leave him & don't look back. When they become truckers, they turn into a Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde personality. It is a brotherhood/sisterhood amongst truckers, kinda like doctors, they all stick together & on the news a Wichita trucker just went to the pen for 12 years for possessing child pornography. Yes you don't have to be a trucker to possess child pornography, but it is a known fact that truckers are notorious for this kind of stuff. I am married to a trucker & he has been a trucker for over a year & I have seen the personality changes in him & I did no provocation on my part to piss him off. So do what I do - I blocked my husband's phone # on my device, I unfriended him on all social media, so this way here we have no contact whatsoever, out of sight, out of mind! And when he does have home time, I drive to my parent's home & stay there & party with my friends till he leaves! He has gotten the hint & his religion forbids him to divorce, so I adjust & do my thing. You need to look out for yourself! You say you love him, but does he love you? Good luck!

May 31, 2014
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It's Not You, It's Him NEW
by: Anonymous

Do yourself a favor & my advice to you is leave him & don't look back. When they become truckers, they turn into a Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde personality. It is a brotherhood/sisterhood amongst truckers, kinda like doctors, they all stick together & on the news a Wichita trucker just went to the pen for 12 years for possessing child pornography. Yes you don't have to be a trucker to possess child pornography, but it is a known fact that truckers are notorious for this kind of stuff. I am married to a trucker & he has been a trucker for over a year & I have seen the personality changes in him & I did no provocation on my part to piss him off. So do what I do - I blocked my husband's phone # on my device, I unfriended him on all social media, so this way here we have no contact whatsoever, out of sight, out of mind! And when he does have home time, I drive to my parent's home & stay there & party with my friends till he leaves! He has gotten the hint & his religion forbids him to divorce, so I adjust & do my thing. You need to look out for yourself! You say you love him, but does he love you? Good luck!

May 29, 2014
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Oh please NEW
by: Anonymous

You & your story makes me wanna puke & gag! I just wanna hire a band & celebrate when mine leaves for the road but I will be celebrating permanently when I leave him for good! Yours treats you like crap but you insist on loving him! Do yourself a favor & remove your rose colored glasses!

May 22, 2014
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Cards and Love Letters NEW
by: Just call me D

My husband has been driving for 23 years now. After 11 years of marriage, 3 young children at the time, and never being apart he decided to get into trucking FOR THE MONEY. He wanted to be a "good provider". I was 100 % with him (at first) but learned very early on that it just wasn't for me. I did not get married only to be ALONE.

Being a “provider” isn’t all about money, it’s also about “providing" love, attention, support, inspiration, compassion and guidance. It's about PRESENCE, not presents.

It was new and exciting to him and he had lots to learn. But the kids and I would always cry when he left and missed him terribly when he was gone. I begged him for years to please find something else but apparently trucking got into his blood.

Early on I would always write him love letters and notes and hide cards under his pillow in the truck. When he first found them he would call to tell me how special they were to him. But by the time he got back home he seemed to have completely forgotten all about them. I guess he was always just too tired to remember, I don't know. It made me very sad and hurt that he didn't even remember and still bothers me to this day.

I ride in the truck with him (3 years now and I hate it). He likes it but it's much different for him, he keeps busy while I'm about to drop dead from boredom. When we aren't arguing about what a nightmare this hell of a lifestyle is for me, he'll start talking and reminiscing now and then and I realize that most all of his memories have to do with trucking. While he fondly (or unfondly sometimes) remembers this company he was with or that company I think back and remember the kids and I going through a living hell during those times. Missing the hell out of him, scared to death of being alone, crap company with crappier pay, not much food on the table for our kids, our kids being teased in school because of their clothes, lights getting cut off, landlord always looking for money, etc. And when I mention those things to him he says "I don't remember things being like that". Well of course not, he was too busy "trying to provide for" his family and creating his own memories while his marriage and family were falling apart.

I tried my best to keep the love alive and keep the home fires burning. But when all he ended up doing when he got home was to yell at the kids, yell at me, want time on his computer and very little to nothing to do with us I finally gave up. He was obviously totally exhausted and completely burned out and had no time for us. The kids and I would just pray that he'd hurry up and leave so we could get some quiet and get back to our own dysfunctional lives.

Keep writing your letters and do what YOU can to keep the passion going, love alive, and home fires burnin'. When you don't use it, you lose it! And when you grow APART it's very easy to GROW APART. I wish you all the best! It's an extremely hard life and not for everyone.

May 14, 2014
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be creative NEW
by: Balliet

I leave notes in the truck or the pockets of his jeans. I have made him a photo album to put in the truck. I read books or audio books about relationship and change the information to help fit our crazy life style me working and being a busy mom plus him out on the road for 3-6 week. Get creative text message, pictures, anything small helps and makes a difference. Good luck

May 03, 2014
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Why? NEW
by: Anonymous

I am new to this & currently on the road where he wants me to be with him. Its 'was' OK for several months but doing nothing gets me down. When I got in this relationship I didn't know his job,when I did I was totally unaware of what was going on because he was off for a month. Now i know, so when he's gone I wish I was too. I relate to your story but I must ask why? For you, myself, & others. I am contemplating leaving the situation or just going on with my life dating others & if he's around well fine because if not oh well. He says he will work local which I feel is total BS.Do you have kids which keep you there? I just don't get why women stay?

May 03, 2014
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very hard NEW
by: American Trucker

Leave him letters in truck, take a couple trips.

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