Trust issues - depressed
by Carol T.
Hi, just joined the forum. Need some advice. My boyfriend just passed his cdl and waiting for orientation and start of driving his first miles.
He's been out for 6 weeks now, and even though he was told he could take a week off he decided to stay in the paid for hotel as he does not have any income. In between college and now back at the hotel he has not called much and when I call him he leaves the room he's sharing with another student driver.
At first I didn't think anything of it and I want to be supportive but it seems he's hiding to talk to me. They have had parties in his hotel room as well as during school they (other student drivers) got together to go out and drink. He himself told me one of the guys who is married with children, said that if he had a chance with a woman he would definitely take it.
Although I trust my boyfriend his coed makes me insecure he is living with the type of guy who is always talking about woman and things I can't mention that are inappropriate. The thing that makes me very insecure is the fact that my boyfriend has to leave the room when I call so that I won't hear the noise.
I feel as if there are woman in the room as part of the "get together" and he is lying to me. The reason I feel this way is because he says he'll call me back and he doesn't. If I text he won't answer, this has happened every time there is a so called get together for happy hour or hanging out. There are woman in his class however HE is the one that by his actions is making me feel insecure.
I feel this new trucking career will destroy our relationship. We've been together for 10 years and have not been married due to his financial burdens and child support issues. He has no way of contributing to providing for our family so he choose to give trucking a shot.
For this reason I can understand the sacrifice what I don't understand is why should I always be the supportive one and he does not see that I am also affected by being home alone taking care of everything else. Instead of making me feel at ease and that he is not doing anything he shouldn't, is the total opposite.
He makes me feel he's lying and hiding something. To clarify, I am not the needy type. I have a demanding job and kids so not much time for that, however honesty is everything to me.
I have given up a lot to be with him and spent many years of my life waiting for him to get things settled. It makes me feel so insecure and sad that after my sacrifice to continue with the relationship. I lost all these years of creating a stable family memories for my kids for nothing.
Sorry for the length of this, just feeling very depressed. He's losing our relationship just for a few months between studying and hanging out at the hotel until he's assigned to drive?
It's like he's a little boy with college freedom, I don't even recognize him. This is affecting my daily family life having the household to myself, daily stresses and his attitude is just contributing to affect how I can handle his absence plus having to worry about if I can trust him or not.