Married but single
(Mount Dora, FL)
My husband and I met on September 2006. It was a rocky start from the very beginning. Even though he was very pushy and very persistent I liked that about him.
Funny how that's the thing that bothers me the most now.
I was single before i met Jose year for about a year or so. I really wasn't looking to meet anyone. I wanted to do something with my life before settling down. He was a truck driver from the very beginning. I thought it was perfect.
I didn't feel ready for a serious relationship yet. We dated and got engaged a year later. We moved in a month after.
Married on February 2008, pregnant shortly after and our daughter was born December of that year. All of this was happening so fast, but I thought this was life.
We bought a house in 2010 and our son was born in 2011. I stopped working because my commute to work was about an hour drive, plus day care for two children isn't cheap. You would think I was so happy and I had it all.
Yeah, all but a husband.
Sure I knew what I was getting myself into, but I just thought I wouldn't be so alone. We fight all the time, but now it's worse. He says I have a bad attitude and now he is saying he wants a divorce.
I guess it's my fault because I've stayed this long. Of course I do! He calls and only asks about the kids, never once asking about how I feel and when I do say something he complains of how every other woman in the world does this and how I don't appreciate anything he does or what I have even if all I say is I have a headache.
I don't consider myself a bad person. I don't curse, lie, cheat. I have done my share of partying in the past but who hasn't. That I don't agree with everything he says I don't!
He was brought up very differently then I was. He has a very different outlook on life, family, etc. Everyone has a right to their opinion, but when it has to do with my kids, I DON'T THINK SO!!
His mother believes in being friends with your child and letting them do as they please. If they want to sell drugs, she will go along for the ride. Oh and they do not have to finish school as long as they make money to pay her bills.
His dad wasn't around because he was in jail for selling drugs himself. My parents aren't saints either. My mother is an alcoholic and is very depressed because my dad is a work-a-holic and was never home including being with other women.
Now with all of this said I have a lot of issues with who stays with my children. I have every right! I am their mother! I am the one with them when they are sick! He isn't their.
My husband hasn't been home for two months. And in the past when he is home he EXPECTS me to have dinner on the table, wearing something provocative, and the kids dressed up.
WHAT ARE YOU KIDDING ME!
What century are we living. He gets home sometimes at 2 in the morning. The last think I am thinking about is any of the above. I am home all day with the kids. I love them and I appreciate that I am able to be with them, but he gives me no credit at all.
I'm the one who pays the bills (yes he works, so yes it's his money), but he calls for me to transfer money, I have to set up any appointments for the kids, the house, the car, etc.
I wake up in the middle of the night to check on the kids, making sure they are ok, they are safe.
Not to mention keeping the house clean, and all the other stuff that needs to be done around the house. I don't cut the lawn because I need to draw the line somewhere! So forgive me when I am in a bad mood!
I am always alone! And the person I want with me is my husband! I didn't get married to buy a house, have kids, or raise a family alone!
I appreciate all of the crap he has to put up with out there because I know it's not easy. It's hard being out there alone and dealing with people that think because you are a truck driver you are a no one.
But I'm alone too!
When he comes home he is too tired to do anything with the kids or around the house but expects sex! Why? Because he's a man! Right. Well, I'm a woman and a way to my heart is to have some understanding about how I feel.
He came home with a puppy the last time. I didn't want a dog in the house. I am not a dog person. I have nothing against animals or their owners. But I have to have my house clean!
My son just started walking and he puts everything in his mouth! It's just gross to me. He doesn't care about how I feel or what I say.
The verbal abuse is out of hand. I'm just alone and tired. I mean I could be a real B! and easily be one of those women that uses him for his money and has another man taking care of her when he isn't home and I don't.
And he still worries about my attitude instead of trying to figure out what is wrong with us, with him, with me, he prefers to get a divorce! COWARD! So what now? I don't know.
I took off my rings... I sent him a text and said I give up and he wins. Pray? Ok and in the meantime???