Frustrated about how things are going


(Houston tx USA )

I have been with a truck driver for 10 years we still aren't married. We have 2 kids. Our relationship has been super rocky this pass year.

When he's home he's always tired and never wants to spend time with us. I am fed up !I get no help I do work, go to school and raise my boys!

I try to make him understand but he just doesn't get it. Yet he feels he's the man cause brings home the check.

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Dec 01, 2012
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Things to try NEW
by: Anonymous

Communication is number one. Once the lines are broken they need repair. A good idea would be to go to church and ask a pastor for marriage counseling. Try not to wait until it is to late and everything is out of control.

If he is not willing, do not sacrifice yourself, try and get the counseling for yourself, to learn how to cope with this situation. Your boys will eventually need some counseling as well.

Children are very receptive to pain as they are to love. In other words when you think they do not understand what is going on they feel it! It measures in at the same weight. So do not sacrifice them either.

Another good idea is to involve your children in an outside activity where he must take them to this event. Set it up so this takes place on the days he is home, and you have to go to work. Be it in a form of a birthday party in which he must take the boys to the store to buy the gift, wrap the gift, dress them for the party, and take them to the party. Leave the invitation out so he can see they must attend, and there is no getting out of it.

Truckers our sometimes out of touch with socializing. Being behind the wheel for long hours and fighting traffic,can become monotonous, and downright nerve wracking! They must run to get the fuel, run to get the load, run to take a shower, hurry up to wait in the same sense which quite frankly is aggravating. There is little to none interaction with others due to these complications. How do I know? I listen very carefully to my husbands grunts, and irritations on a daily basis.

However, I know none of this is my fault nor is it my problem, I just listen. When he is home he needs to be around some sanity, so I plan what I can, and suggests things to do in public. I say no to the couch, and I have a weight set in the dining area, and a stationary bike. Things are not always peachy, and heck neither is this world. Never sacrifice your sanity, or who will be here for your babies? Move on when it is time, is always another option.

God Bless and take care :)

Dec 01, 2012
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Totally understand NEW
by: Anonymous

I can totally relate, I've been with my truck driver for 5 years, engaged for 4 years. We also have 2 boys. He is gone all week also, when he is home he is always working on his truck or relaxing. OUr relationship has been rocky for over a year now, as I am sick of doing it all and never having help. He thinks that he doesn't need to help as he is tired and has worked all week, little does he know what we do in a week. He can't even manage his boys on the week ends when I work. If you come up with some way to fix this let me know, your not alone.

Nov 17, 2012
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Please contact me ASAP NEW
by: Anonymous

Hey......... do u now live in Lancaster, Texas? and our ur boys the age of 12 and 7?

Nov 08, 2012
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Jesus: NEW
by: Anonymous

Jesus is the answer for any relationship.

Nov 07, 2012
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fed up NEW
by: Anonymous

The father of your children needs to wake up and smell the roses and if he can't then you need to move on

Nov 06, 2012
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Options NEW
by: Anonymous

What do you want from this relationship? How do you manage things when he is not there, and even when he is there? Is this relationship 50/50 or is it 70/30, and your in the lead as the main giver?

Most relationships end up in a 70/30 one partner giving more than the other. If this is happening in yours, you may benefit from some counseling.

At least you can see things from another perspective when, someone explains to you what a good relationship consists of. If your husband does not want to meet you half way, you may begin to feel neglected, and like you are the only one in this relationship.

If he does not want to join you, well you could go it alone, and seek the counseling on your own, and for yourself. Why keep beating yourself up over something you have no control over?

If you are looking for more in this relationship remember one thing, in order for it to work there has to be 2 people involved in it.

Wishing you the best of luck, and may God bless you for all the good you have done for others!

Nov 06, 2012
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I know NEW
by: Katie

I know how you feel , when mine is home , he eats & then goes to bed . He just came off the road last month & is doing local so he has now been home most nights but still works on saturday . Sundays he goes to his friends house so we never get any alone time ever. It is extremely frustrating ! Keep your head & if you ever need to talk let me know :)

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