Confused and alone
Well me and my trucker are not married but we have plans to be in the future. We have been together for 6 years now. We have 2 girls, one is almost 5 and I am currently 36 weeks pregnant. He has been driving for almost 2 years now and I must say it has been a big change since he started.
I love my trucker very much and cant see myself living without him, but in a way I kinda do. I mean he isn’t hardly ever home, and I know that’s part of the job but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. I just miss the time we spent together before he started driving.
I feel alone most of the time. Yeah we talk on the phone everyday but its just not the same. Its hard and I know him being in a truck all week isn’t easy on him either, but he doesn’t show it. When he comes home he usually has plans to do whatever it is he is wanting to do, which is fine.
I know he has a life besides me but it would be nice to just spend a little more time with him. Sometimes when I do call him I feel like I am bothering him or like he doesn’t want to talk and that makes me feel weird and makes me wonder if we have the same plans for the future as a couple.
I love having my daughter and am looking forward to having my second one here soon, but I feel like a single parent and sometimes I need a break. Not only do I tend to her but I also work a full-time job and a full-time college student.
I am just stressed and overwhelmed. To be honest I don’t know how much longer I can go on feeling like this before I just reach my breaking point. I feel like I put in all this effort and get nothing in return. Like I said I love him very much but everyone has their breaking point