All alone.....again. How do I deal with the distance apart?

by Suzi
(Barrie, Ontario, Canada)

My name is Suzi and my hubby is a long haul truck driver.

Now I know that the trucking industry is unpredictable and I understand that he can't control when he gets pick ups and return loads but he has missed our family Christmas again this year. He leaves Monday morning and is suppose to be home Friday nights but he is rarely home before Saturday nights.

He says that still gives him 2 days at home but not with me. I work at full time job so I am at work on Mondays so I only see him on Sunday and I'm finding that its no where near enough time for me.

We were suppose to spend this weekend alone together (which is rare given the fact that we have 3 teenage boys between us) and here I am, Saturday afternoon, again, sitting alone.

Please believe me when I say that I do understand the trucking life as I was a truck driver myself for a period of time but I'm really starting to feel that we are drifting away from each other.

I'm beginning to feel very lonely and frustrated. I don't know what to do about it.

I'm hoping that maybe those of you who have done this for a long period of time can help me manage these feelings. I love my husband very much and don't want things to drift so far that we can't get them back.

I'm just lost right now and I'm not sure what to do.

Any advice or help you could offer would be greatly appreciated.

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Dec 18, 2011
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lucky
by: Anonymous

Wow, you see him every week? I don't get even close to that. 1-2 days a month, if that.

Dec 18, 2011
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marriage and trucking
by: hervy

Suzie, if you haven't already check out this page.
Growing distant will definitely happen if both people in relationship/marriage are not intentionally nurturing the relationship.

You each must do the things that make the other more able to feel comfortable with the given situation. We are talking about practical and possible things.

Also, intentionally focusing on mastering the communication between you will help improve things.

So often we state things wrong and we hear things wrong and issue come up because the two people were not on the same page. And this is a problem with not just marriages but businesses and friendships too. What makes things worst is that too many people will want to blame the other for either misstating or lying and the problem is worsen because that wasn't how things went down.

We all need to monitor how effective we are at communicating what we mean. I often read something I wrote and just shook my head before writing it over another way. I wonder how often I do that verbally, lol. (it's not funny)

But take a look at this page and also read the responses that some of the other women got in addition to those that you will get.

trucking lifestyle and marriage

Wow, just found this, Check out Sally's and her Husband's journey.
Marriage Tips for the trucking life

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