Agoraphobic Wife of a Trucker
My husband and I have been together going on 10 years. In that time we have had many ups and downs but always have been very much in love. He has struggled on the past finding a job that supports us and our 4 children and it was always hard for me to watch him unhappy.
Recently I was diagnosed with agoraphobia. I pretty much am a classic case but in the last year it has slowly crept up into a really inconvenient problem. For those who don't know what agoraphobia is or does, I am crippled with anxiety and cannot be comfortable and any public place including grocery stores driving and pretty much anything that has to deal with anybody I don't know. It's a bummer lol.
So in April of this year I told my husband who always wanted to be a trucker that there was no reason why he should put off doing it any longer I had to come to the realization that my happiness can not solely depend on him being there every second that I need him.
One of the symptoms of agoraphobia is having that one or two people that you depend on to go with you to public places when necessary pretty much hold your hand like a big baby. so I had to put my big girl panties on and i had to let him go.
We're about 2 months into the trucker's life and our relationship isn't different we're still communicating functionally and he's really happy doing something he really loves.
I have been forced into a situation where I have to confront my anxiety and agoraphobia head on and I will do this and continue to do this because of my love and appreciation for my husband and my love for my children but it's not going to be easy.
I count my blessings because my husband loves his job I am lucky to have a very capable man whom I get to see more often then wives of soldiers sent overseas the men that work in the oil fields truckers wives are luckier then you think.
I'm not sure what the future holds but one thing I do know is that my husband and I have the type of relationship that can withstand anything time apart only makes our time together that much sweeter and each time he comes home I'm a little bit more independent than when he left and that is worth its weight in gold.