Resentful Recruiter Girlfriend

by Arika
(California )

I’m realistic so with all do respect to everyone on here I just need to vent but need insight as well because I Do not know it all.

I’ve been a Recruiting Manager for over 10 years I’m the one who helps candidates find their jobs or essentially help them into their next role.

No I’m not the lying psycho recruiters that work for shitty transport companies that lie to your husbands promising and selling them dreams to get a warm body in a car ... thing chief financial officers and medical staff etc .... any way Backstory:

My man is over 37 years old transitioning from a not so legit lifestyle but very personable, great personality he could apply himself to do anything!

After almost two years of being broken up he relocated We we’re happy and doing things the right way I had been working my ass off longer than planned. paying all the bills while he figured it out.

I was immediately pissed because I knew the mindset and position your relationship needs to be in and the special person two people have to be for this to work out! We just aren’t there or I know I’m not here’s the feel:

I feel like this is a way out maybe he’s using me he couldn’t move out the shit town state we were from until I did then after three years later he can’t tell me where he sees our future.

He says he’s doing this for us but everything is trucking this and trucking that.

He asked me if I would consider getting my CDL and ride with him .. like are you a fucking idiot?

You do one accomplished responsible thing and you want me to quit my
career making over 85 k a year to come ride with you? He must of read that on some brainy trucker website he’s been researching..

What about my kids who’s taking care of them?

I couldn’t get his ass off the game fast enough to get a job and that’s all I do for a living .. the irony right ... now finally after I guess after he got tired of me bitching and fed up he woke up and decided to become a trucker and he’s been non stop he passed he’s ready to join a company now the lowlife elementary school recruiters all over him.

I’m jealous this was supposed to finally be about us and now he’s being ripped away and that’s his choice

I said all of that to say this I hate him my biggest insecurity is he will pick up the cutest free thing to come take a ride and join his new found journey since he mentioned me getting my CDL while I’m over here playing wifey!

QUESTION: What’ is the down time to really meet up with women?

I want to be happy and supportive because this is new milestone for any man who has never had a legit life style Over the age of 35 however imo the money that people say they make that is
Great I don’t see it you’d have to do years or
Haul forever non stop to see that kind of return.

I feel like F you and to any woman who has this similar story of feeling like.. why? If it’s long term and he hasn’t married you, run cause this is bull n torture don’t be a glorified girlfriend that’s a man child !


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May 31, 2019
Thank you NEW
by: Anonymous

I want to say you are very knowledgeable I really appreciate that you take the time to dedicate your personal journey and allow away for other to vent and give perspective every ones journey and problem is situational but a lot of perspective is found in the circumstantial real life events that majority of us face I know it’s hard for many of us to face but let’s fsce it humans and people are beautiful we want to know others but want to feel valued and loyalty at the same time especially those who have given and trusted without knowing if that blind commitment is truly going to pan out for them in the end ! We all have to make a dolllar any one who is reading this VALUE AND COMMUNICATE APPRECIATE and be clear on your intention!if your partner is unclear ! If you are insecure and don’t have clarity either way you or him vice versa.. probably should let it go ..who wants a one sided relationship ?
This career field if you are in a serious relationship is a SACRIFICE on both parts it’s not your general ideal and no ones got time for games and no one on the road deserves to be nagged IF they are giving you clear communication we can do bad on our own !!

That’s All!!

May 21, 2019
Are You Wrong
by: Hervy

First I edited some of cursing. Hope you understand.

I can appreciate your frustration. I would classify your attitude toward the situation as wrong or right. Its your perspective and you know him amd details more than us.

I do want to point out some things you mentioned like a sound board and offer my 2 cents about it.

You acknowledged mindfulness about the relationship not being where it needs to be to withstand this. Thast good because many people are blinded and dont recognize. So how do you keep from being taking advantage of long term?

He doesnt respond favorably whem you ask of the future plans. That could be a sign. But it could be related to uncertainty about how trucking will work out, or how he feels about you.

One thing to keep in mind is he actually asked you about joining him. Unless that was game, that seems he actually did see you in the picture for a while.

Not saying you should quit just saying that he was OK with you being with him. Lots of guys if they are just trying to away and have a desire to be free and mingle this would come up.

Of course you shouldnt be expected to automatically want to leave a career especially with kids. Seems he would understand that. But now we're talking about personal development.

We often dont assign great value in evaulating a persons attitude toward life, relationships, parenting, work, money management, etc.

If he selfish or incosiderate type of person that eventually is expressed in your relationship. Which I think you have seen.

You are right he doesnt have to drive OTR for a lifetime to make this work out.

He can get his year, save, build credit, buy a truck and lease on to a small company.

Then drive every other week or take shorter loads and come back home. Or if there are some bills that need to be taken care of firsr after that is done and money saved up then scale back.

Also he could began working building another business to transition into. Lots of businesses he could start with trucking as a backbone for funding the growth of.

The main thing though is to discuss the future and plan accordingly.

Thats said, if he doesnt think that way its a challenge. If he is unsure because he is new in trucking that makes sense. However you can still make plans based on different paths. The plans can be updated at the year mark etc.

I do t knw what an elementary recruiter is.

If you're extremely jealous that either says something about him or you or both. Lol.

Really you have think evaulate the reasoning behind that. That needs to be addressed or used a warning sign.

Mostly there is not a lot of time for picking up women and women are not around to be picked up like most people think.

However, if he is the type who would put in a lot of effort to make it happen then of course.

He could stop at Walmart and holla at women very easily.

Doesnt take a lot of free time to do that, takes more free time to follow up though.

I always tell drivers most of their free time should be used brainstorming about mutliple streams of income, reading/studying materials that will assist your progress in life based on the plans I talked anout making.

However, many people rather watch television, play online, etc.

Taking time to seek companionship is can be done online though. You probably know if you have reason to doubt his committment to the relationship or not. Remember some guys get caught up just looking or chatting amd things evolve and evolve. Next thing you knw its at the next level.

"Think about how people clowned Pence for being proactive" People often dont think that way.

So you have to evaulate his personality. You knw him and level of his thinking. That affects his thoughts and behavior.

Having a plan and ideas about the future helps to stay on course.

I think you have a serious conversation about the future and if he doesnt want to have it, evaulate his response carefully and make your response a careful one as well.

Best of luck.

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