IM AS TOUGH AS THEY COME BUT EASILY BROKEN

by messina
(san elizario, tx)

First of all this is a great website...now for my story I am a truckers wife...kinda sounds like I'm in a AA meeting.

I love my trucker an the 2-4 days out of the week we get to spend together is never enough. I have to share him with our kids an his friends. The day he has to leave is always the hardest for me and for him. The nights are hard for me because i cant fall asleep for fear of someone breaking into my home an stealing my kids. Also its hard because i am afraid that in the morning i am going to get a call that my trucker fell asleep on the wheel.

I am a truckers wife and i am also his dispatcher his maid his cook his baby sitter his accountant i do it all...i get so tired sometimes an wonder how the hell am i doing all this...its so hard because my trucker gets so frustrated out there in the road away from us but an it never fails 10 hrs away from home he turns into the biggest jerk...He's mean an we argue on the phone i know he's tired but hey so am i...i wish i could drive his truck i would go out on the road an let him run the house see if he likes it...

The minute he walks into the house an he sees homemade food on the table, he forgets how mad he was an how he acted with me just minutes before he walked through the door...I get so frustrated but i do love my trucker....there's times that i am so busy but if my trucker calls, i have to stop what i am doing so that i can do whatever it is that he needs me to do for him.

Sometimes i feel like leaving an never being married again..sometimes when he gets home he is so tired i let him sleep an we do nothing but watch him sleep...when he's home we hardly ever argue...when he out on the road i stay home. I have no friends. I have no job. I have no life...its the business and the kids.

My kids take a lot out of me they both play baseball year round so its never ending...i play softball and i love it...it is so stress relieving but i do get a hard time from my trucker because its not fair he's out working while i'm playing...well i'm always working 24/7 i never get a break even when my trucker is home i still have to cook an clean...sometimes i feel like i'm about to break into a million little pieces but i keep it together how i have no idea...my trucker is the best though, he loves me an that out weighs any of the bad.

Over the 7 yrs that i had to stay home with the kids without my trucker i have learned to ignore him when he's 10hrs away from home...oh yeah an what helps the most is text messaging i love it i dont have to hear him...that's my story