Been a Truckers wife for 9 years...

by thegraymoth
(IN)

I've been married to an otr trucker for 9 years now. It was fine at first, I rode with him off and on, as we don't have any little ones any more.

Then things started changing in the last couple of years. I don't know if it is just me, or what. We moved my Mom in this year due to health issues, and I had been working up to that point.

Seems the last year or so, he spends a lot of money on the road, (advances) that doesn't allow for enough to cover the bills here at home. He claims that he doesn't spend that much (400 to 500 per week.) and that I am not thinking about how much it costs to eat on the road.

He recently has a lot of online chats with his ex, that he tries to delete (he has forgotten one or two times.) and he guards his cell phone. If he does get a call, he leaves the room, and sometimes goes outside.

So he gets a new phone, and forgets to delete the contacts from the old one, and there are calls that I know that were made at certain times, that are now missing from the log, and there is names in the contact that I know are not people in his company.

One woman I called, and she denied knowing him at first, then tells me that she probably worked on his truck at one point. I found out later that she is a team driver in another company. So why does he have her in his contact list?

I don't know, maybe I have gotten paranoid through the years. Maybe someone else has had this happen. I don't want to accuse him of something just because "I think".

What do you all think?

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Oct 19, 2013
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your doctor is stupid NEW
by: Anonymous

He should be giving medical advice and he should stop trying to be a therapist.. do you know how doctors know so much about std's besides just what they learn in a book? Because doctors are the worst cheaters in the world they have full reign of female nurses, female doctors, and female patients.... they are the biggest whores of them all...a smart thing that idiot doctor to say to you would of been NO MATTER WHO YOU HAVE SEX WITH YOU SHOULD ALWAYS USE PROTECTION!!!! That doctor of yours is a dumb ass!!

Furthermore, why would YOU sit around and LIE to your husband and tell him you are not feeling well just because you dont want to have sex because you fear std'd????.....and because you dont have the guts to tell him the truth??? seems to me the one who is admitting to being a liar is doing the most lieing....

There are more cheating women than there are men nimwit....because there are more women in our population than men and there are more gay men as well, so that gives women a higher count on being cheaters....

COMING FROM A WOMAN's perspective!!

Oct 19, 2013
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Phone records NEW
by: Anonymous

Being able to track phone numbers when you get your phone bill is good because you can see the calls made but when phone numbers keep showing up incoming & unavailable, then you can't call the numbers! That happened to me & I asked my husband who they were & he told me he had no idea who they were & then mine said to me that was my # because my # shows up unavailable since my # is blocked & doesn't show up on caller ID & I told him that my # was listed on the phone bill & I told him we don't talk several times a day for over an hour! When mine gets home, I will see to it that I am not feeling well so we cannot get together because if mine is fooling around, I know for a fact, he would keep it from me that he was doing it & to be safe from a possible STD, it is best to abstain from it because my doctor told me that some men can be carriers meaning they don't get symptoms or the disease but can pass it on to their partners! And my doctor also advised me that about this site, there will be women on here that will say oh not my husband, he has never cheated on me, well maybe there are SOME out there, but VERY FEW men will be that way!

Oct 19, 2013
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Phone records NEW
by: Anonymous

Being able to track phone numbers when you get your phone bill is good because you can see the calls made but when phone numbers keep showing up incoming & unavailable, then you can't call the numbers! That happened to me & I asked my husband who they were & he told me he had no idea who they were & then mine said to me that was my # because my # shows up unavailable since my # is blocked & doesn't show up on caller ID & I told him that my # was listed on the phone bill & I told him we don't talk several times a day for over an hour! When mine gets home, I will see to it that I am not feeling well so we cannot get together because if mine is fooling around, I know for a fact, he would keep it from me that he was doing it & to be safe from a possible STD, it is best to abstain from it because my doctor told me that some men can be carriers meaning they don't get symptoms or the disease but can pass it on to their partners! And my doctor also advised me that about this site, there will be women on here that will say oh not my husband, he has never cheated on me, well maybe there are SOME out there, but VERY FEW men will be that way!

Oct 16, 2013
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Really??? NEW
by: Anonymous

I think your problems started long before that! Trucking is not the problem! He is unhappy with you & he wants out! Give him what he wants & hope your next catch is a better one!

Oct 16, 2013
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goth comments NEW
by: Anonymous

not only did/do you women have cheaters but dumb cheaters. Why would they waste their time hiding a phone, texts, pic's, etc....all they needed to do was have an extra phone hidden in their truck so you would have never suspected anything? I would say they wanted you to find out so they could have an easy way out because they are also cowards for not coming out with it and breaking it off in the first place. Get a hold on your life and please move on who wants to be with a lying, cheating, coward anyway?? good advice about protection while having sex and this includes any relationship because truckers are not the only people who cheat!!!

Oct 15, 2013
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Sorry for a wasted 9 years... NEW
by: graymoth

So sorry that that happened to you. I know he is a very good liar, as he lies to other people right in front of me, and never bat an eye. He has 5 children from 2 other wives, and while they are grown, he spends alot of time trying to make up lost years with them. He uses his ex to communicate with them,,but I have found where he has complained to her about things going here at home. I really find that to be offensive, as that should just be between us. He also has a very good friend (male) that he tells everything to. He told his ex that I don't like his friend, (supposably because he isn't christian), but that isn't totally true. I don't like the way his friend talks him into doing things, and talks about women like they are all sluts. Anyway, it may take me awhile, but I will find out for sure. And maybe I am wrong, but I WILL fight any woman for my dignity. Whether he stays with me or not. I will not let another woman destroy my life. Thank you for sharing your story, I know it has been hard on you. Bestest to you!

Oct 15, 2013
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understand NEW
by: Anonymous

Well first off go with your gut. I just went through the same thing. Only to find out he was cheating on me. I use to go with him a lot. Then my daughter had a baby and I have been helping her with him. So then I noticed he using more and more money out there. I ask him and he said there were things he needed. But when he was at home I never seen anything new. Also his phone was always with him and when I could get it he had it locked so I couldn't get in. But I knew something was going on, so I just went to the cell phone company and copy of phone records and I started calling the numbers I didn't no. That's how I found out about 3 different women he was seeing on his trips from east coast to west coast.

I called him told him what I knew he still tried to tell me he wasn't doing anything. One of the women had went me the textes, pics, and messages he had sent her. when he came home the next day I showed it all to him. Well he had noway of getting out of it so he said he had been cheating for about 2yrs. Needless to say he doesn't live here anymore and I took what I had to attorney and we are in process of divorce. We had no children between us but I' ve been with him for 9yrs. He will be paying 1200.00 per month to me. Judge looked at him and told him he should be ashamed of what he did. I also have 2 STD and I will be on medicine for them for 6 months.

Just be careful and don't let him bring you down to his level. If you feel he doing something wrong you already have your answer.

I'm here if you need to talk and there will be a lot of others telling you to stand by your man. But if you do make sure when you sleep with him use protection. Don't let him give you something that will take along time to get rid of or something worse.

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