It's ruff

by Aaliyah

My husband been a truck driver since 2001,we been married 6 years,and getting ready to have our 5th child. I have no support from his family at all.

I move from Ohio-Texas thinking at least if he not home I have support from them. No way they do not call or visit unless they need something.

They very rude,when it comes to me. So I get rude back with them.

My husband cheated on me 3 times,and if he lying about this time I'm filing for divorce I cannot take being done wrong.

I'm 26 years old,and we have 4daughters and a baby on the way. I love him,but I'm so fed up,I don't know what to do or say, because I'm tired.

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May 25, 2012
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Dear Ms ruff NEW
by: Anonymous

I truly understand how you feel. with 5 kids it makes it hard for him not to be in trucking but I am there myself except the kids part. my husband is gone mor than home. if he is willing my be try counculing. if he wont try that then get a book called 'the Power of a Praying wife" By Stormie Omartian. this might help you out and praying for him I am a christian woman too. God be with you

May 25, 2012
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Dear Ms. Ruff NEW
by: Anonymous

I did give positive feedback to your post, I am not sure if you looked down that far in the post area.

I am a positive person so that is why I wrote a positive post to you.

There are way to many negative women on this site, but please don't hold that against all of us.

I believe in family unity and taking the right and positive approach to family situations. # 1 being that the family should stay together if feasible solutions can be offered and used.

As a Christian women you should also be aware that the good people outweigh the negative people here on earth and you can understand this if you look at the statistics on religion and our people.

So try and not be to judgmental about what other people are doing, thinking, etc.... and just worry about you and your family you will be much more happier this way.

As I said before I wish you all the luck with your family situation and I am glad you chose to stick to family unity.

Sincerely,
Helonwheels :)

May 25, 2012
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I thought about it. NEW
by: Anonymous

No I'm not getting my tubes tied. I'm married,and I love my kids very much. We agree to 5kids. I finally talk,to him because it was a lot of miscommunication. He admits to talking to them,but he never slept with them. But as a Christian woman I should have never ever let divorce even be a option. In first thing women say go get childsupport,or this in that. I thought I would hear more about how to save your marriage. But I society say other wise. I know whatever he does he will have to answer to GOD FOR IT. ALL I CAN DO IS PRAY,AND FORGIVE HIM.I refuse to take the kids out his life,and move on. Because that's there dad,I don't wanna be with anybody else. I saw to many kids in distress when there parents got divorce,and the kids try to suicide. Yes we will be going to marriage counciling. God can save marriages,and life's. God Bless

May 25, 2012
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I thought about it. NEW
by: Anonymous

No I'm not getting my tubes tied. I'm married,and I love my kids very much. We agree to 5kids. I finally talk,to him because it was a lot of miscommunication. He admits to talking to them,but he never slept with them. But as a Christian woman I should have never ever let divorce even be a option. In first thing women say go get childsupport,or this in that. I thought I would hear more about how to save your marriage. But I society say other wise. I know whatever he does he will have to answer to GOD FOR IT. ALL I CAN DO IS PRAY,AND FORGIVE HIM.I refuse to take the kids out his life,and move on. Because that's there dad,I don't wanna be with anybody else. I saw to many kids in distress when there parents got divorce,and the kids try to suicide. Yes we will be going to marriage counciling. God can save marriages,and life's. God Bless

May 25, 2012
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starstarstarstarstar
I thought about it. NEW
by: Anonymous

No I'm not getting my tubes tied. I'm married,and I love my kids very much. We agree to 5kids. I finally talk,to him because it was a lot of miscommunication. He admits to talking to them,but he never slept with them. But as a Christian woman I should have never ever let divorce even be a option. In first thing women say go get childsupport,or this in that. I thought I would hear more about how to save your marriage. But I society say other wise. I know whatever he does he will have to answer to GOD FOR IT. ALL I CAN DO IS PRAY,AND FORGIVE HIM.I refuse to take the kids out his life,and move on. Because that's there dad,I don't wanna be with anybody else. I saw to many kids in distress when there parents got divorce,and the kids try to suicide. Yes we will be going to marriage counciling. God can save marriages,and life's. God Bless

May 24, 2012
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Really? NEW
by: Anonymous

Get your tubes tied and get the hell out. Cheated 3 times?? Regardless of whether or not he is on the road, he will cheat again. Go find some happiness and be sure to get your child support.

May 24, 2012
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Life is hard but you are strong!! NEW
by: Anonymous

I really do not think that quitting his job would be the solution?? If he did quit his job are you willing to financially support all 5 babies?? Because that is exactly what will happen. There is no work out there today that can support that many children! So eventually all those babies will end up on welfare and food stamps, medi-cal! As she has stated she has no support from her family either! Really you can't come up with a more realistic approach to this situation??

Lets take a more realistic approach to this situation and really help out this Lady in distress.

Dear Ms. Ruff,

You are a very strong person to stay at home and support your children emotionally.

Here are a few suggestions I hope will help you to help yourself:

1.) Locate a local Mother and child support group in your area and attend. Or one on one counseling.

2.) Talk about your struggles. Bring every issue to the table so you can find different angles on how to either accept your situation or find a feasible way to leave the situation.

3.) Locate a planned parenthood facility and attend any classes they offer, this will help you make wise decisions on having more children or not.

4.) Locate local parks that offer free children's programs so this will help you get out and socially meet other people who can be potential friends. Family members are not always reliable.

Okay now that you have worked on you and your children because you guys are first.

5.) Locate a marriage counselor and offer this up to your husband as a resort to saving the marriage.

There are many free programs out there to help families stay together regardless of your income level such as your local clergy, free clinics. For a family of seven the National Living Expense Standards: housing/utilities etc...... can potentially help you qualify for many free programs.

It takes work to help yourself and the rule of thumb is that really nothing is truly free it must be worked for in your case the work would be in the way of research and this can be done in your home as long as you have a computer, internet, phone. Which means you are off to a good start because you posted here which means you have the tools! :)

I wish you all the best in your future!
Helonwheels :)

May 24, 2012
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TRUST ME NEW
by: Anonymous

Your husband needs to give up that trucking job, and come home, and find a job close to home, so he can provide for you the intimacy and companionship that you married him for, and so he can help you raise those children you both made together. You need to forgive your husband's infidelity against you. There's a lot of temptation out there on the road, for a man whose gone more than he's home, and because he's already cheated three times, being away from home as much as he is, it's likely he will cheat again, not for love, but just to get laid! You need to put your foot down, and demand that he make a decision. You have to much on your plate, to be expected to do it all by yourself, when you have a husband that can help you. You might as well accept a life of loneliness, if he refuses to quit that over the road job, or get a divorce, so you have open doors to a better life for yourself and your children.

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