Good days and bad days but going through them alone is the hardest part

Well there are the good days and the bad days, just like anything else, to be honest.

I could whine that I miss him but then he could be in a foreign country and not come home for a year or two like some of our military families have to go through.

I could whine and say that he's cheating but he could cheat here if he really wanted to. I'm at least honest enough with to let him know that it's something I struggle with.

It would be nice for the kids and him to be able to spend more time together but at least he's able to come back and actually be here to spend time unlike some fathers who totally ran away or have passed away.

I could have a better husband, but I don't. The grass always looks greener on the other side.

It gave him confidence that he could find work and that right there, is why it's hard to ask him to stop and come home. But I think drivers support each other and its the network of friends and that habit of traveling to get away from struggles that's hard to break.

But the 'driving habit' takes them away from strengthening their family and home network and that is the part that makes me feel the struggle.

We as wives end up bearing the weight of family and household management more than when they were around and sometimes without their financial honesty or proof of what they make. But it can be the same way in a normal relationship.

I think building a strong support network and support system for ourselves is key to a healthy outlook whether or not you are single or married for anyone, married to a truck driver or not.

Leaning on them is not the answer and asking them to be support is not the answer. Be strong without them so you can be proud of yourself without their approval and you will both be happier.

These kind of men usually want it simple, a home life is usually just too complex and this way they can escape it and still make a living focusing on the complications of just work.

They're also caught up in seeing America, different cultures, weather trends and challenges, nature and travel. They don't have to stay anywhere too long when there is strife and then they can be on their way again to 'get away' from it and do something they know they can trust - watching the stripes and adding up the miles.

Airline pilots, military, journalists, or anyone who has to travel 85% for work could be considered in this same scenario. Anyone who dedicates this much time to their work and doesn't have family life balance can make it a struggle on the ones who shoulder it.

It's not just truckers though and how you deal with the challenge is up to you, just like any other challenge that comes your way. So you can whine about it (or wine about it) or make the best of it and live your life.

Comments for Good days and bad days but going through them alone is the hardest part

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May 24, 2012
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Doormat? NEW
by: Anonymous

Not sure that it's all that healthy to be in a relationship where you don't want support from your partner. That is partly what a relationship is built on. It goes both ways.

Also, what's this I hear about hiding finances? That is not acceptable either..... You are a team, or you're not...

Why would you not stand up for yourself a bit here, instead of accepting the fact you are "kind of married", leading two different lives and only using each other to hook up once in a while.. ? Are you a doormat here? Not trying to be disrepectful, but come on....

Do you not love each other? Is it that hard for him to spend quality time with his family?? Wow, I guess when you set your expectations that low, you're a hard one to disappoint.


May 24, 2012
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YEAH RIGHT NEW
by: Anonymous

I thinks it's selfish and unrealistic for men to expect their young wives who have children, to be able to go through their lives as a single parent, denying their needs as well for intimacy and companionsip, and expect them to be happy. How unrealistic is that? The ladies who say don't whine, are probably having a great time when their husbands are gone, their probably cheating!

May 24, 2012
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Great Post!! NEW
by: Anonymous

I agree with you on all levels of your post!!

Although I am glad there is somewhere trucker wives can vent here on Life as a trucker.com, I also see where we must step down from the whining because most people everywhere have similar problems equally.

After the venting, a realistic approach must take place. Stand strong and get up or simply get out! Why would anyone hang on to a miserable life if they are so miserable? Right?

Thanx for being real!! :)

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