The Dating and relationship information here will help you to get a big picture view of your situation and how to best proceed. Use the lessons that you've learned from past relationships along with the insight here to guide you.
However, be careful and use the lessons and not assumptions or hyper judgment.
It will be useful
for your happiness as a truck driver or the wife/spouse of a truck
driver. (Or in any relationships actually)
The trucking lifestyle doesn't allow much room for incompatible couples or poor communication habits. So you will have to be smart about these relationships and nurture them well.
If you are considering becoming a truck driver, I highly recommend you read all of this dating and relationship information to help you think in advance about some issues that you might face and how to best handle relationships living a trucking lifestyle.
I recommend single drivers to hold off dating for the first year of becoming a trucker, but if you are going to date as a trucker or if you are going to date a trucker consider the thoughts that follow....
If you are single, it may be in your best interest to stay single until you get your 1st year of experience for several reasons.
Your first year is with a company that is likely to keep you out for a month at a time.
On top of that, you are new to EVERYTHING.
Bottom line is this....the trucking lifestyle is difficult already for
many people. The unpredictability in the first year for a new driver
makes it even worse and many drivers will get stressed.
Not having history with a person (getting involved soon after beginning trucking) makes it even harder to have a good relationship while being on the road because you don't know each other well yet. This leaves a lot of room to wonder and speculate due to having no development of personal trust.
My theory is take out all of the complications and distractions (read as strain) you can for both.
After that year you know what to expect of the trucking lifestyle and can communicate that better to someone you care about.
Plus if you are not happy at that company, you can probably go to a company that treats you better including getting you home. Happier you, more predictability, easier on the relationship.
If you are already involved or getting involved, this relationship information is for you. It takes a special spouse to make a good companion for a truck driver. Just like it takes a good person to be a faithful trucker.
Keep in mind the stereotypical image most people have of truck drivers. Cheaters, overweight, drug users, no telling what else.
Knowing this misconception exists about drivers, what type of spouse do you have and how is the relationship between you two? (Is there good communication, trust, openness?)
If these are problem areas you may have more problems if you decide to become a truck driver before addressing those issues.
What about her personality? Is she self confident, independent to a certain extent, out going, trust worthy, responsible, goal oriented?
If she doesn't posses at least most of those characteristics she may not be the type of person that would make a good spouse to a truck driver.
"Why?", You say.
Well, if your spouse does not posses those characteristics then she may start doubting you on the road. There will at some point be unexplainable (I should say unbelievable at least to the person not having been out on the road) situations will that occur i which you can't call or answer or forget.
She will need to trust you and be understanding
during those times. If she is easily persuaded by her friends or if she
already had doubts about your infidelity before you became a trucker
driver you will start to have problems. They will continue to escalate
as time goes on."Girl you know what he is doing", is what they say.
But wait, you too have to be understanding to to see it from her point of view. Getting upset at her (even if she is wrong) is not going to help her understand. Making her stop asking questions or talking about it is not going to erase the doubt in her mind either.
So just remember, you have a responsible role to play also if you want peace or more importantly if you want to communicate your love. But.......hey who's perfect
So the type of person you decide are with is important in many ways. Not only in a truckers life but in life, period.
If she never believes you then it may show in her attitude and now there's doubt in your mind about what she's doing too. (See how easily things could just erode into two people going through the motions but losing interest in each other)
Note:All of this could have started because you lost a phone signal for during several of her calls in the middle of the day. Sprint has problems on the AA highway in West Virgina. There are some pockets West of I-35 where you will lose signal strength, going through Kentucky at places you will loose signal strength. On the I-10 Bridge in Louisiana for some strange reason the phone drop calls also on the Sprint network.
If you have trust issues and she hasn't witnessed incidents you will encounter first hand, she is not likely to believe you. Especially after 2 or 3 incidents of question.
Dating is less of a problem theoretically because it assumes that the relationship is more casual. The key to dating as a trucker is being up front and letting your intentions be know from the start. Of, course that would also mean that the other person should be up front and straight forward from the start also. No agenda to change things in the relationship and no games on either side.
If each person is honest and let the other know what type of relationship they want to establish things could be very manageable.
(BUT: How likely is it to find this in today's culture?)
However, you and I both know that things can change and then what? You start with the same problems as if you were in a more serious relationship. Because of this, you decide to give an inch and the spouse wants a foot. You are still stressed out because now your on different pages.
If you are going to date or be in a relationship while you are a truck driver. You need to check the characteristics of the partner that you will be dealing with. You are going to suffer if you deal with a partner that
is . . .
1. If you insist on dating or being in a relationship during your first year of driving, carefully look at the quality of the person you are dealing with don't settle for a person that is not compatible with you and your intentions to become a truck driver.
2. If it is possible, after truck driving school take your spouse with you on the road for a few weeks. This way, hopefully some of those moments will occur which she won't have to wonder about when you try to explain them to her while your are on the road and he or she is at home.
3. The spouse at home should get involved I some kind of productive hobby or activity. (OH, yes kids do count!) If you are serious and plan on being a couple then it may be smart for her to take classes about transportation industry like dispatching or getting motor carriers authority or anything that could provide value should you decide to make bigger moves in the trucking industry.
Who knows you might want to take your ambitions to running your own trucking company. What she learns could help you two to make an informed decision on how far you want to take your venture in the the trucking industry.